My friend Jan

I have known Jan for about 15 years and she will feature in future posts Im sure. She is one hell of a bird. She has LIVED and knows how to LIVE like tomorrow might never come. She has got the best philosophy on life that I have ever come across, she has told me stories that have literally had my jaw on the floor, boy has she lived, we have shared some very special times. She has had a rougher ride than most of life to be fair but she has taken it all in her stride. She laughs more than anyone I know, she sees the funny side of everything and is the best prankster I know. We are the most unlikely friends.

When I met Jan, I was about to embark on a career as a pub singer and about to do my first gig in a proper dodgy bar - it was in the days when pubs closed at 3 on a Sunday, this place was dodgy cos they closed the curtains at 3 and carried on. I remember walking in and thinking SHIT these people are gunna crucify me, in fact I could die here! Her partner Eddie was sitting at the bar (he looked like a hells angel, pony tail the lot) and they were obviously regulars, but man they looked fierce, I was crapping it. When I started singing they made me feel welcome and I soon realised that they were good PEOPLE, and because they liked me everyone else did, PHEW!

I see her a few times a year these days but we became true friends about 6 years ago... I always go to her house for a drink on Christmas morning, this year, she had found a way to undo forrere roche, empty out the middle and put brussel sprouts in the middle as a surprise for her dinner guests, that just sums her up!

Something really bad happened to Jan 6 years ago and it was the start of a beautiful friendship for us, I know she wont mind me sharing this with you. She was on her way back from India (long haul) after enjoying her annual 3 week break there with Eddie (the same person that Danny and I seen on his way to work that morning in the park). He had proposed to her during the trip which had been an amazing one, these are PEOPLE that know how to enjoy themselves.

In fact they enjoyed themselves so much that some PEOPLE didn't like them. The day they were due back someone came into the bar that I was running at the time - it was a Friday night, he said did you hear what happened to Eddie? I said no? he said Eddie collapsed and died on the plane over Germany, just like that!

I spent the next few hours on the internet trying to locate her, the morgue, the chapel of rest, the airport, but to no avail. My sister said, she will call you.

The plane had to be landed in Munich airport and she had to leave Eddie there to return home, she was worried that they would cremate him and send his ashes back and she needed someone that could speak German to make sure that didn't happen. Although we were not the closest of friends at the time (we understood each other and socialised in the same circles), she knew that I was resourceful and strong and so my sister was right, I was one of the first PEOPLE she called and I collected her, broken and shattered from the airport. That was the day that we became friends for life.

The following weeks were horrendous not just for her, but for everyone around her. I played a small part in helping to sort things out for her; finding someone who spoke German, calling the PEOPLE that needed to be called, transporting her wherever she needed to go even if it was somewhere out of the way so she didnt have to face PEOPLE, getting drunk with her when she needed to and giving her space when she needed solitude to come to terms with her grief. My family helped too, between us we made sure she was eating properly and that there was milk in the fridge. We did this because she is my friend, there is something about friendship that knows no bounds no matter how close you are at the time, I would do the same for any of my friends if they needed it and expect most people reading this would too. Not for thanks, not for praise, not to feel good about yourself, not so you can tell PEOPLE what a wonderful friend you are, just because that is what friendship is about.

Some PEOPLE said I did it because Eddie worked for the council and I thought there might be a big pay out and money in it for me (he was a temp by the way).... Some PEOPLE are just plain cruel.

Eddies was only 52 when he died and his memory lives on in all that knew him. In true Jan style, although it devastated her, she has not let losing him destroy her, she still lives life to the full and she is one of the few people on this planet that make me feel priviledged to know her. She is one hell of a lady!

Only me and Jan know exactly what I did and didn't do and I don't give a t**s what PEOPLE think, I was there for my friend and I know beyond a shadow of doubt that she would do anything in her power to be there for me if I ever needed her to be.

Jan is one of the most awesome people I know, I love her and I know she loves me. Who gives a SHIT about what PEOPLE say??